It is very hard to decide which board to post my question. I decide to give this one a try. Please feel free to move it to a "right" board.

Now that I am learning about God's unconditional love by "un-learn" some of traditional teachings about "hellfire", "book of Revelation", etc. I begin to wonder whether I should continue to take my son to my traditional church.

My son is only 7 year old and he has been in church since he is only two months old. I "threaten" him about "going to hell" if he does not accept Jesus when he was 5 while he asked me questions about "death". When he first learn about "death", he told me that he does not want to die because he likes to play and watch TV. He asks me few times what will happen to him if mommy and daddy both die, who will take care of him. He really concerns about "death".

When he asked me about "death" the "N" times, I decided to bring about "salvation" to him. Wow, he cried very hard right there because he was so afraid of "hell" and will be there "forever". Of course, he said the "Lord's prayer" with me out of the fear of "hell"........

Luckily, he did not remember this "drama" when I asked him what did he learn about "hell" few days ago. In Sunday School, teachers told them that if they are not good children and do bad things, they will go to hell. That's all he remembers.

Should I continue take him to the church and "un-do" the part that I am "un-learn" right now at home with him? Or, I should keep him at home on Sunday?

Tina

Hi Tina

My daughter was very young when I came to the belief in universalism and what I found was that it was the view she had of God within her own being. I simply witnessed it. When I said to her one time that God will not give up on anyone and that eternal torment is a man made lie she said 'God would never do that! How silly to say that about God!'

Kids know within but we kill it with all our doctrines and fear teachings. I bet if you are telling him that this teaching was wrong and that God is not like that the child in him that knows this and knows His father will rise up again and dispell that. For perfect Love whom God is casts out fear.

My daughter can be around that teaching and it not affect her because she is very much convinced of God being love but only you will know if your child can do the same. If he can thrive in an environment where a fearful God is preached or not?

I pray you are given wisdom and strength to do what is best for your child.

blessings

This is so true, out of the mouths of babes comes perfect praise.

Hi there,
I've known about universal reconciliation since my close encounter with God in 1977 (at the age of twenty). You may have read (or not) that I recently quit a 20 year full time worship leading 'job' over eternal torment doctrine.

I have 2 daughters - now 24 and 16 and they were both born and raised in 'church'. The good thing is that very little was said about eternal hell in all those years until more recently. I told my oldest about 'no hell' when she was about seven, but now she apparently forgot (!) and I neglected to talk to my youngest who was VERY involved in youth group and the children of church leadership.

It first dawned on me that there was a major MAJOR problem when I read a testimony by Roger Tutt, a former missionary to India who had a total nervous breakdown while on the field because he couldn't bear thinking about all those whom he was failing to reach being tormented unceasingly. If I remember correctly, he came back to the states with his family and then (basically) stayed in bed for 10 years (!). Then one day, God showed him UR and His great love in general, and he's been fighting the good fight ever since.

Once I realized how destuctive ET teaching really was, I coud no longer endorse it - even in my very loving/non-judgemental church. I talked to my wife first (she was raised hell fire Assemblies of God and already knew I had 'funny ideas' about hell- LOL) and my then 15 year old daughter who had been slipping into depression.

Her depression was basically from being taught the mainstream Christian worldview, ie: that the world was out of control, God was good but was ready and waiting and willing to pour out His fierce wrath upon all the billions of sinners who were just to evil and stupid to repent. She loves people SO MUCH, and the thought of God creating them and them being helpless (by His choice) to stop their runaway 'free wills' was really tearing her up.

After I explained all the truth - she closed her eyes, dropped her head and sighed deeply. Head down and misty eyed she proclaimed "I knew it! I knew it wasn't true. But I thought I HAD to believe it!"

She has truly been transformed.

Tinali, this is a tough decision that I would never endevour to try and make for you. Again, the 4 fellowships I attended for 31 years had an AWESOME grip on God's love and character for the most part. ET was always way in the background, but when push came to shove (when it was challenged) that WAS the belief system. My children DID benefit from the drug free, very good atmosphere as far as the youth groups and our group of friends and the day-to-day love and fellowship. Both my daughters were/are home schooled, so their social life was based around 'church'.

On the other hand I would NEVER EVER again endorse a belief system that portrays God as loving, but also so cold (which is explained away as 'holy' and 'perfect') that He cannot allow fallen humanity into His presence and is OK with the sorry creatures (who didn't ask to be born in sin) falling into a painful, dismal eternity. All that is such absolute insanity and MOST Christians prove they only give mental assent to it by going to moves, vacations, chit-chatting etc. while the whole mass of humanity supposedly slides into the bottomless pit. NOBODY really, in their heart of hearts believes this stuff!!! The few who really take it it can and do can suffer severe emotional ramifications (like Rodger did).

God Himself will help you make that call - I am sure you want your son to really know God and His true nature of perfect forgiving love :-)

blessings,
- Byron

Yeah, its weird, my views have so changed as my children have been growing. We go to a church every once in awhile and I use it as an opportunity to share what I believe is not correct.... I think for kids to learn that the system is not "thus saith the Lord" may help them not to totally reject God when they become adults. i think maybe that is the reason so many leave the faith as adults... they are taught that the church know all truth as children and when they are old enough to think for themseves and see contridictions there is one two options, believe the church or leave.

I place my kids in Gods hands, so far so good, who knows what is to come .. God is faithful
For me, I believe in total honesty with my children when it comes to this walk - they know I dont know it all, but they know that I love God and that God loves us :P

Thanks all for the sharing. All your points of views are well received and being considered in my future actins.

My son is a Chinese and there are only two Asian boys in his grade. He learns that there are difference between Chinese and American cultures. I do not isolate him from either of cultures but help him to understand the difference and make the appropriate adjustments.

I think I will not isolate him totally from the church life unless I have better alternatives. I will let my son go to church for a while till I un-learn lots of traditional teachings myself. I think I have a long way to go before I can judge what is the best thing for him.

I will pray for God's leading on him instead of my own efforts. God allows me to stay with traditional teaching for 25 years and finally brings me to the concept of "UR". If I believe God has HIS purpose for everything, then I will have to believe that this 25 year is not a waste in HIS eyes. Otherwise, I will go crazy and mad about all of those "false teaching" and the waste of my 25 years. I think you get my points.

Blessings,

Tina